It’s Menopause Month again…
A few days ago, I watched an Insta post by Dr Liz O’Riordan, the breast surgeon turned breast cancer patient who is widely present in the British media. You’ve probably seen her on Lorraine or in the Daily Mail. Dr Liz mentioned some really awful side effects of her cancer treatments, such as blurry vision and a very sore tongue that makes everything taste horrible. What was worst, she said, were the hot flushes and night sweats from the hormone suppressants she needs to take. “It’s just so hard to deal with… I just feel miserable.”
Working for the Breast Cancer Haven in London I had many clients like Dr Liz, who were struggling with the effects of sudden onset menopause. What surprised me was the impact hot flushes had on women who were dealing with breast cancer in some form or other. They reported feeling overwhelmed and helpless. As someone who never had struggled with hot flushes I thought surely there must be bigger problems when dealing with cancer. Listening to my clients I realised how truly debilitating hot flushes must be if they overshadowed everything else.
I started running an EFT tapping group for managing the effects of menopause and specifically hot flushes. I taught my clients how to tap at the earliest onset of a hot flush. We also tapped on the debilitating and often depressing thoughts and emotions that come with being in this situation. And it worked a treat. One client told me, “when the hot flushes come, I tap on the side of my hand and say ‘Here we go again!!! I can’t take this anymore… I’ve had enough…and I accept myself just the way I am’, and the hot flush disappears. It’s as if it thought, ’Oh, she’s doing this thing again, I don’t even need to bother’.” Others told me that their hot flushes hadn’t completely stopped but they felt much less bothered and overwhelmed by them.
At some point I realised I should offer this tool outside my breast cancer work. After all, so many women struggle with hot flushes. I offered courses, free intros, taster sessions, all to no avail. No one was ever interested. I never understood why. But listening to Dr Liz’s reel I get it. She says she wants to talk to her consultant about another medication that might help.
Currently she is on Citalopram. Is anyone else baffled by how many different complaints GPs are prescribing anti-depressants for?
I have often found that what people want is a pill. A magic pill they can buy and forget about the problem. I can relate to that, it’s only human. If I am choosing to use tapping to deal with your hot flushes I need to see it as part of a lifestyle routine which gives me the time and space to address my needs and emotions. It may take more time, but the benefits are plentiful. Meds tend to address a symptom not the cause. The very act of sitting down to tap is a moment when we turn towards ourselves with love and care. Instead of giving the patient a pill and saying, ‘go away and don’t bother me again’ we say to ourselves, “tell me how you are and let me take care of you’. Of course, I know that in many instances medications are necessary and lifesaving. But I know from my own experience that a holistic approach that includes mind and body can yield better results than pills alone.
When I saw Dr Liz’s reel my heart went out to her. I left a heart on her post and resisted, not for the first time, the urge to pm her and offer help. There is still so much hostility among medical professionals against techniques that help patients without resorting to pharmaceuticals (although, to be fair, Dr Liz is a huge advocate for exercise during breast cancer treatment).
If you are a woman struggling with hot flushes and you’re open to the idea of practising some loving self-care, perhaps speak to the EFT Practitioner of your choice (make sure they are EFT International accredited) and try it. The worst that can happen is that it doesn’t work. But if you’re open to listening and responding to your body and mind, it just might.
In any case, I will continue to follow Dr Liz O’Riordan because so much of what she has to share is absolutely invaluable for women with breast cancer and for those, like me, who support them. And for that I am incredibly grateful.